A Long Road Home By: David Miller
“Five minutes to landfall marines!” the coxswain shouted over the erupting chaos in front of us, the Higgins rocked back and forth in the waves. My hands clenched around my rifle and I bent my knees to work out the stiffness. Three hours ago we had left the relative safety of the fleet to go to this hole. I glanced around the boat at the other soldiers; none of us had seen battle yet, so of course kind Uncle Sam tossed us past the frying pan right into the fire. The marine in front of me turned “Hey Knight! I’ll see you on the beach!” he laughed at the statement but I could see the far in his eyes. The Higgins thudded against the sand and every muscle in every marine tensed in anticipation, the gate dropped and immediately bullets filled the boat. The marine in front of me convulsed and a warm spray hit my face, I rushed the beach and ducked behind and iron X barrier. I looked back at the boats and saw soldiers collapsing as machinegun fire tore through their bodies the sand turned red and clumped together as solider after solider fell. After a deep breath I sprung out from behind my cover and sprinted up the beach trying to hold my footing in the loose sand proved to be a difficult endeavor and by the time that I slid in behind the next barrier I was sweating. My eyes traced their way up the cliffs to a bunker that continually spat bullets down on us, a soldier to my right tried to make a break for the barrier I was behind only to have his head relieved of his shoulders. I felt a hand on my shoulder and spun around as my hand grabbed at my knife,
“At ease marine!” I stopped my motion and let my hand fall away from the hilt of my knife as I looked at the solider in front of me, he looked to be about mid-thirties with close cropped salt and pepper hair.
“This is some kinda mess Uncle Sam got us into now!” I said finally
“You got that one right son! I’m Staff Sergeant Vice” he shouted extending his hand.
“I’m Lance Corporal Knight it’s nice to meet you Sergeant” I said completing the gesture. Both of our gazes fell back to the bunker at the top of the cliff firing down on us, It was only one of many but it was a problem none the less.
“We need to get up there Sergeant!” I shouted over the gunfire, when I looked back at Vice he was grinning from ear to ear.
“Well then you had better follow me boy!” With that he stood and began sprinting toward the cliffs; I scrambled to my feet and started to run after him, struggling to keep my footing in the sand that continually sucked at my boots and tried to pull me to the ground where I would prove a much easier target for the gunners above. By the time I slid into the trench next to Vice my legs were screaming at me to stop running, my eyes burned as sweat ran into them and my breathing came in quick panting.
“Come on Knight I thought you were a marine! How’d that little jog tire you out?” The sergeant had a smile on his face like this was the most fun he’d had in years. “Come on Knight the rangers opened a path up these cliffs, those army boys are almost ready to be marines!” I laughed at the joke and looked up the ladder.
“Ladies first Staff Sergeant!” He laughed and started on his way up the ladder; tears filled my eyes as I glanced back across the beach and snapped off a quick salute to my fallen comrades. I climbed up the ladder and glanced over the ledge at the top, the sergeant was crouched behind some boulders with a pair of army rangers. I scrambled up the last few rungs and over the ledge then dove behind the boulders with the others, my eyes clenched tight, my knuckles white around my rifle. A voice broke me out of my thoughts and brought me back to reality
“You ever killed anyone ‘rine?” the question came from a weary looking ranger to my right. I looked down his uniform, searching for an identification tag but couldn’t find one, he must have noticed me looking because he glanced down. “Well dang! I musta lost it comin up the rocks. I’m Lieutenant Swanson pleasure to meet you marine”.
“The pleasure’s all mine ranger, but I think I would much prefer this meeting in another setting maybe one with a few less bullets”. He chuckled at the joke and gave me a clap on the back,
“You’re a funny kid ‘rine.” The laughter died in his throat as a bullet chipped the rock above our head. “These Krouts wont give a guy a bit of rest will they!” as if on cue a grenade dropped at my feet, my mind blanked and out of pure instinct I scooped it up and threw it back toward the bunker. The explosion that followed shook the ground around us and made all four of us loose our balance and fall to the ground
“Hot dang Knight looks like you hit the ammo box!” cheered vice.
“Well then let’s go make sure it’s clean and get movin again!” said Swanson. We jogged around to the door of the bunker and Vice opened it a crack, he gestured toward the crack and Swanson pulled the pin on a grenade and lobbed it in. As soon as it exploded we rushed into the room and checked our corners, when we had cleared the main room we split off in pairs to clear the other rooms. The rangers took the left side and Vice and I took the right, we cleared our side easily with no resistance, and on our way back we heard a single rifle retort followed by several bursts from a sub-machine gun. Vice and I exchanged glances then rushed thru the halls to a small room, we rushed in and swept the corners for danger, then we noticed Swanson, he was on his knees on the floor tears in his eyes desperately trying to stem the flow of blood gushing from the hole in the other rangers chest. Any words that I might have said caught in my throat as I watched the last of the other ranger’s life drain away, Vice walked over and placed a comforting hand on the rangers shoulder
“Come on boy, its no use you know that as good as me.” The ranger hung his head for a moment then stood slowly, he bent down and grabbed the fallen ranger’s tags and as he turned his face took on all the emotion of the concrete around us.
“Let’s keep moving” he said solemnly, we nodded our agreement and made our way out of the bunker into the sunlight once again. As soon as we emerged from the bunker we noticed a small group of marines in a firefight, they were pinned down in a shallow trench and were close to being overrun. The three of us sprung into action immediately, we circled around so that we were located behind the Germans then fired into their unprotected backs, time slowed around me as the bullet left the chamber and dug into the spine of the German that I had targeted. I watched as he fell, a type of morbid fascination filled me as I watched the soldier hit the ground as the Germans turned to address us we dropped to the ground and the other marines opened fire. As the remaining Germans fell I stood and rushed over to a trench and vomited, Vice came over and placed a hand on my back.
“Come on kid it was either him or you, and I think you made the right choice”. I smiled weakly and wiped my mouth as we headed over to a trench and sat down. My hands shook as I tried to eat some of my rations, my mind kept going back to that moment when I had pulled the trigger, the way it felt to watch as I took another mans life. How time seemed to slow down as the bullet left the chamber, and that morbid fascination that I felt when I saw him fall.
“Relax boy, everyone dies sometime, I guess it was that ones time.” Vice said suddenly, I jumped at his sudden words but gave him a weak smile. “Aye Staff Sergeant its just, back home I’d get life for killing a man, but here I get a pat on the back and a ‘good job’.” Vice chuckled a little bit,
“Well boy, that’s the joy of working for Uncle Sam he cares about his family but he treats everyone else like a mother in-law”
I grinned at the joke and my nerves steadied slightly as I ate my ration biscuit. We relaxed for several minutes before we made our way over to the hastily constructed command tent,
“Swanson!” a gruff voice rang out and Swanson turned to see who had addressed him, he saw the solider walking toward him and his face lit up with recognition.
“It’s about time you found your way back private” he said a weak grin finding its way onto his face, the men shook hands briefly, “Where’s the rest of the squad Jones?”
The private’s face dropped “when we got separated some Krauts hit us hard on our left flank. We lost Jenkins and Arveladze.” He paused for a moment. “Where’s Jacobs?” Swanson’s jaw clenched and he shook his head slowly. The private was crushed; he tried to stay strong, but a rivulet of tears marked paths down the grime on his cheeks. We pretended not to notice to preserve the boy’s pride.
Swanson turned to us “well, boys I’ve gotta’ go take care of the rest of my squad, don’t you boys go dying on me now.” We said our goodbyes and I went with the sergeant to find our troop. We worked our way through several trenches before a voice broke over the clutter
“Knight! Ooh Rah you crazy som’ B****!” I grinned and turned to see a soldier running toward me.
“McGee! Ha-ha, I thought the krauts got to ya!”
We embraced tightly for a moment. “Where’s the rest of the squat, Mickey? “
“Most of us got through but Motley.” He paused for a moment “Young took a bullet to the shoulder, and Motley went out to get him. The Krauts opened up on him; he got young to the trench but he took a bullet to the thigh, and two to the chest; He’s in rough shape.”
I felt a knot rise in my throat, and tried to blink the sudden wetness from my eyes. Private Motley had become a close friend during our time at combat training; he had been engaged before he felt the call and joined the marines. I looked back to McGee. His lips were moving so I focused in “he’s been asking to see you, says he has something to give you”.
I nodded solemnly knowing full well it would be a bundle of good-bye letters. I followed McGee to the tent where Motley was. Pulling back the flap and walking to motley’s cot, I clenched my jaw and forced the rush of bile back down my throat. Motley was a wreck; his leg was half gone; it was a miracle that the artery hadn’t been hit. The bandages around his chest sank in at the points of impact. I slowly walked over and he looked up at me with eyes half glazed by morphine and blood loss; He grinned weakly in recognition. “Hey there, Knight” he said softly followed by a cough that left fresh blood on his hand. I forced a smile to comfort him.
“Hey buddy, how ya’ feelin?”
“Like I just took three rounds from a machine gun” he grinned weakly again “I’ve got some letters for you knight” he said taking on a more serious tone. My jaw clenched and I blinked the sudden moisture from my eyes, Motley produced a bundle of letters and placed them in my hand. I locked eyes with him as his arm fell away and the last breath he would ever take left his lungs, but still his eyes locked on mine in his death store, I took my hand and closed his eyes then rushed from the tent and emptied my stomach into a bush. I wiped off my mouth and headed off to find my commanding officer, I asked around for about twenty minutes before I found my squad they were gathered together bloodied and shaken, but all together, all but Motley. We exchanged stories for about an hour then went to the makeshift barracks to get some well deserved rest. I collapsed onto my cot and was asleep before my head hit the pillow. The next morning the squad gathered outside the barracks as the sergeant laid out our orders.
“All right, Leathernecks! Our regiment is going to take back Huppain then we’re moving on to join up with the Brits at Port-en-Bessin”
“Ooh Rah Staff Sergeant!” We quoted the mantra without thinking,
“Lets get stocked and we’re moving out at 0900, now move out!”
We separated to go get our packs together; McGee sat down next to me with a sigh.
“Two hours till we go back” he said in a voice hardly above a whisper. I nodded and we sat in silence for a moment, “I saw him get hit Knight, it all happened so fast I could barely tell what was going on ‘till I saw him fall.” Tears filled his eyes, as he futilely tried to blink them away. “I dragged him to the trench, and all he would say was ‘How’s Young doing? We told him Young was fine, and he just started smilin’ like he had done all he was on the Earth to do. The medic took one look at him and his face told me all I needed to know, he grimaced, it was just for a second but I caught it. It was like him saying that there was no hope.” His voice trailed off and he broke down, I put my arm around him and he let his emotions go. It was the first time I had seen McGee cry like that. We had known each other practically since we were born and this was the only time he had cried like this in front of me. It was then that I knew that we wouldn’t be the same after this war, McGee had changed after one battle and I could feel the cynicism edging its way into my thoughts. McGee gradually pulled himself together and we finished packing, I set my pack down and went to my cot to retrieve my rifle, when I turned around I noticed McGee slip something into my pack. I didn’t pay it any mind figuring he had slid in some thing I had forgotten.
“Let’s move out ladies!” the sergeant’s voice boomed out over the camp, McGee and I scooped up our packs and ran out to the squad. McGee and I found a couple seats on a truck and settled in for the ride that would take us two Klicks from Huppain. As the truck bounced over the war torn roads, McGee settled into a sullen expression and stared straight ahead. The minutes turned to hours until the truck finally stopped.
“I’ve got a bad feeling about this” McGee said before I could respond we were shoved from the truck by the troops behind. Gunfire could be heard coming from the town ahead.
“Looks like the Airborne’s already here. Double-time marines!” The order came from the commanding officer. We immediately took formation and began our run to the city. The retort of gunshots could be heard clearly, and as we neared our destination the screams of the dying reached our ears. We reached the city and our companies were immediately sent in at different angles.
“Fox company! Circle around and flank ‘em!” The commander finally said. We gathered around our sergeant and started off around the surrounding buildings. A few minutes later we were at out destination. We broke around the wall and dove behind cover; cars, broken walls, craters, anything to put us out of the firing level. I stuck my head out from behind a broken wall and several bullets flew past
“Looks like the Krauts know we’re here” I said. McGee nodded in agreement and lobbed a smoke grenade into the street. We waited a few seconds for the smoke to deploy, and then rushed forward. Bullets flew blindly through the smoke and screams filled the haze. We got to the German trench and jumped over the sand bags. We lost all formation and every man began fighting for self-preservation. A few soldiers had attached their bayonets and were using them with brutal efficiency; others used rifle butts to cave in skulls, but most were using their Colt .45’s to take the enemies out quickly.
After the front troops were out of the way, we regrouped quickly and took a quick head count, we lost three men in the charge leaving us with twenty two, We got in formation and proceeded to clean out the trenches on the eastern portion of the street. Then we made our way to the main street to come in on the main encampment from behind. We moved forward quietly, our footsteps masked by the continual gunfire, we reached the Germans and they were dead before they knew we were there. The main force moved up and we went ahead as a scouting group.
We reached an old church and looked into the windows, two guards were sleeping at their posts, and we crept in and quietly made sure that they didn’t wake up. As we left the building I began to think about how I felt the first time I killed a man, how upset and shaken I had been. Now as I looked at my blood soaked hands I couldn’t feel anything; no shame, no remorse, just brutal efficiency. We rounded a corner and saw a contingent of Germans, at least fifty gathered around a Panzer. The sarge called to a private and sent him off to tell the rest of the troops. A few minutes later a dozen troops showed up, four of them holding bazookas
“We heard you boys needed the road cleared”, said one of the soldiers.
“Ooh Rah boys! Lets clear it out so we can clean up the rest of these Krauts.” Came a reply from our sergeant, the men checked their weapons, stepped around the corner and let their rockets fly; all four found their marks and shrapnel flew from the wrecked tank leveling most of the Germans. The handful or so that were left were to shocked to do anything and we cut them down without hesitation, then proceeded down the road. About ten minutes later we found ourselves looking around buildings at the main German encampment. Hundreds of them were patrolling the trenches, I glanced up at a nearby clock tower, and it was 1445 hours nearly six hours had passed since the operation had begun and I had no doubt that many more would pass before it was over.
We sent a small group to go back to the main detachment and settled in for the wait, I tried to talk to McGee but all I could get out of him were one-word answers and head nods. He began gathering his stuff when the main troop arrived. The major came and laid out the battle plan to the commanding officers, who then relayed them to us. Our company moved to the western side and set ourselves up for the charge, I glanced around at the buildings, I couldn’t quite see but I knew that snipers lined the walls waiting to put down the men at the machine guns. Twelve shots rang out and twelve Germans fell, we charged forward from the west with other companies doing the same from the other sides and center. More shots rang out behind us and the retort from the next machinegun line was cut short. In five minutes we had cleared out most of the camp and had a long line of prisoners. Grenades and bursts from sub-machineguns filled the air as the last couple of bunkers were cleared. We gathered up the prisoners and watched as they were marched off to the P.O.W. camps. Medics were gathering the wounded and patching them up. I found my way around and spotted McGee standing with his eyes closed and his face turned skyward soaking in the suns rays. I opened my mouth to call out but before I could say anything I saw his chest explode through his back.
“Sniper!” yelled a soldier to my left. I stood dumbfounded and barely noticed when the bullet tore through the joint of my left shoulder and threw me to the ground. A strong pair of arms pulled me behind a nearby car, I glanced up and saw the man looking through the scope of his rifle, and his shot rang out as the blackness overtook me.
When I cam to I was in a cot looking at the bare concrete walls around me, I noticed a man who seemed familiar to me leaning against a wall with his eyes closed. I tried to sit up but was forced down by a searing pain on my left side. Then it all came back in a rush: Motley, McGee, and so many others had gone, and then I remembered McGee putting something in my pack. I searched frantically for my pack until I noticed the man standing next to me. He was average height, sandy blonde hair and his eyes looked vaguely blue in the poor light. “Hey, there.” He said gruffly “Staff Sergeant Messershmeidt, you can call me Messi” he said extending his hand. I noticed a string of skull tattoos running up his arm, he followed my gaze and grinned slightly “Twenty-three skulls for twenty-three friends lost”. I opened my mouth but found it was too dry to speak, I swallowed roughly.
“My pack” I said my voice raspy from the lack of water.
“Right, right I’ll get it” he disappeared from the room for a moment then re-appeared with my pack, he handed it over. I fumbled with the clasp with my good arm for a few moments until the staff sergeant reached over and undid it.
“Thanks, Messi” I said then began searching through the pockets; my hand brushed against the smoothness of an envelope and my stomach did several back flips as I pulled out a pair of envelopes. My eyes welled up with tears as I read the name on the firs one ‘My buddy knight’. I opened it slowly and pulled out the letter, I began to read the letter slowly.
“Hey buddy, if you got this then I guess I’m gone, but hey, we had fun didn’t we? We’ve been having a ball since the first time we met, remember? We were both at the park down by the creek and you decided that we should have a mud fight. We came out covered in the stuff and inseparable. You’ve always been there for me, even when my mom and dad died you kept my mind off it with your stupid jokes, and making me act like and idiot with you. You and my Grandparents were all I had left, and you guys were all I needed. We signed up together and had some fun times at boot- we never could get that whole listening to the sarge thing. But we still fought through it and came out on top, but it looks like I’m not going home with you. I can’t really think of anything else to say, you know everything else. Tell my grandparents I love ‘em and I’ll see ‘em soon. I love you, man.”
My hands shook spastically as I tried to fold the letter, before I could stop myself I was sobbing uncontrollably. Messi moved over to my right side and placed a hand on my shoulder. “I know its hard, man, but it’ll pass. You get callous to the pain. I’ve lost twenty-three of my friends I can’t feel much of anything, you’ve just gotta remember that you’re fighting for more than yourself, you’re fighting for the rest of the world, but with that arm you’re not going anywhere but stateside, your ticket leaves tomorrow.”
For the first time since I woke up I glanced at my shoulder. The bandages were stained red and a dull pain throbbed through it.
“That sniper round blew out your joint, you wont be using that for a while.” I wrapped my mind around the concept and extended my right hand.
“I’m not sure if I told you my name, I’m lance corporal Knight” I thought for a moment then added “And thanks for saving my life out there.”
He grinned and shook my hand
“No problem Knight, it was either that or let you get shot at again. But I’ve gotta get back to my squad. Have fun stateside, just don’t forget about the rest of us.” We shook hands again and said our farewells, and then I sat alone in my area, sectioned off by sheets on one side and a concrete wall on the other. I tried to keep myself occupied but quickly lost interest in anything that I tried, my eyelids began to droop and I realized how little sleep I had been getting over the past few days, my eyes closed and I was asleep in a few seconds.
When my eyes opened I was lying on a bed in a small metal room, it took me a moment to hear the sounds of the waves and smell the salty air, then I felt the gently sway of a boat and figured I had been put on a carrier while I was asleep. Gingerly I raised myself to a sitting position and noticed that my arm had been placed into a sling. I slowly stood and gripped the rail with my good hand to avoid being tossed to the floor of the ship. My first few steps were tedious as I waited for my body to adjust to walking on the swaying ship I reached the door and pushed it open slowly. My eyes burned from the unexpected sunlight and I stumbled back hastily reaching out for something to steady myself with, when I was steadied and my eyes adjusted to the sun I took a few steps out the door. People were standing around the deck playing ball, injured soldiers were sitting and enjoying the warmth of the sunlight, I soaked in the suns rays for a few minutes then made went back to my cabin and once again slept through a day.
Over the three day trip back to the states I kept to myself. When we got to the port I waded through the crowd and hailed a cab as quickly as possible, I rooted through my pack for a moment then produced the letter with Motley’s address on it. I told the driver my destination he said he knew that area and it wasn’t far away. About a half hour later we pulled into the driveway, I paid the driver and stepped out onto the gravel. I glanced into the garage and caught sight of motleys cherry red mustang; he was always bragging about that car, telling us how it could outrun anything we could put on the street. I walked up to the door and knocked, after a few moments the door opened, revealing a pretty young girl with a baby boy in one arm. The baby’s bottle rested against her chin, and her eyes, wide with excitement when the door opened, lost their gleam and took on a frightened look.
“Who are you?” she asked, anxiety creeping into her voice.
“I’m lance corporal Knight, I served with your husband, may I come in?” She nodded as much as she could with a bottle against her chin I walked in and she gestured for me to sit then headed upstairs. A few moments later she returned without the baby.
“What happened?” she asked, her voice shaking and tears filling her eyes, her tone said that she wanted the truth not some warm, feel good story.
“Your husband saved a man’s life” I said “He was pulling a man back to cover and he took three rounds from a machinegun. The medics tried their hardest but he didn’t make it.” I pulled the letter addressed to her from my pocket and handed it to her, she tried to open it but her hands were trembling too much. Finally I reached out and she handed it over to me.
“’Louise, if you’re reading this letter then I guess I didn’t make it back. I know I said I’d come home and we’d have that family, the life we always wanted. The kids, the house, the fence, the American dream. But, Babe, some promises can’t be kept, we both knew what could happen when I signed up, but I had to help protect our dream, I had to keep it safe for our son. Now it looks like I won’t be there, looks like I won’t get to see Michael after all. Just let him know I love him and that I was fighting for the two of you. Don’t you ever forget that you are the love of my life baby, well, the sergeant is mustering us now so it looks like I have to go, and if knight brought you this letter, give him the ‘stang. He’s a good guy and he can put it to good use. Don’t forget, Babe, I love you’” I folded the note and handed it back to her “you gonna be all right, Louise?” I asked.
“I called over some friends while I was putting Mike to bed, they should be here in a few minutes” She took shaky breath and shut her eyes tightly. “The keys are under the driver’s sea, He left it with a full tank of gas.” She began walking away slowly.
“He did love you” She stopped and turned her head slightly, “You were all he talked about; he would keep us awake for hours in combat training going on and on about the girl that he had back home.” She finally lost control and collapsed forward, I rushed over and caught her on my good side and she began sobbing uncontrollably into my shoulder. We stayed like that for about five minutes until her friends arrived and took her over to a couch to cry with her. I backed out the door and made my way slowly to the garage; I opened the car door and slid in behind the wheel. I breathed deeply the smell of the leather, then turned the car to the south and headed off to McGee’s grandparents house, knowing that this house would be far more difficult than the last.
I pulled into the driveway a few hours later and stepped out in front of the house, I started walking to the door slowly, not wanting the confrontation to come any sooner than it had to.
“Hey, can I help you?” came a voice from behind me, I turned to see a pretty, young girl with flushed cheeks and an inquisitive look on her face.
“Uhm I’m just stopping by to visit the McGee’s”
“Well you won’t find anyone in there; they passed away a few days ago.” I could feel the blood rush from my face and the world began spinning as I stumbled back against the car.
“You all right?” she said stopping my thoughts and bringing the world back into focus
“Yeah” I said after a long pause “I just didn’t know about their passing”
“Ohh, well I have to get going maybe I’ll see you around, by the way I’m Christina.” She said with a smile
“Lance corporal Knight” I said. She waved as she walked away, I slowly climbed back into the car and began heading toward my own home. The drive was short but it was the longest road home I had ever taken.
That is my guitar.)
